The world of the hypothetical is fascinating. I think we as humans like to entertain the world of the "what if's" even though such a place can be uncomfortable. When watching an interview on T.V., it is interesting when a host throws a guest a hypothetical situation in hopes of hearing how he will navigate it. Most often, the guest will refuse to enter into such mind games recognizing that it usually does no good to speak in hypothetical terms because, well, it's not reality.
Were I able to so easily refuse this world of the abstract possible, I may save myself some brain power. Yet, I find it is stimulating to think about what could be or what could have been. Watching the Olympics this week has continually triggered such thoughts. What if I had been born here, been blessed with this gift, been created with that body, been given that passion? It is crazy and somewhat ridiculous to think about. After all, I cannot imagine spinning once around the uneven bars, let alone propelling myself into the air to spin and twist in a fancy dismount. I can't envision jumping once over a hurdle, let alone running at top speed at those looming obstacles. As it stands, I am not even remotely in the realm of Olympic athleticism, as much as I would like to think I am.
There is a part of me that wants to nurse the small pain that bites in such thoughts. The gnawing question of whether or not I have made use of my life presents itself in these musings. How does anyone measure the worth of a life's calling, of a life's work? As I look to start another year of teaching, I peer inward and wonder whether what I do makes any difference. I often describe my job as a constant pouring of time and energy into a proverbial black hole. It frustrates me that the usefulness of life cannot be determined by a scientifically accurate method.
This is where my walk with Christ proves to be a comfort once again. Knowing that He can use all people in any sort of situation reminds me that the outward measure of success is often fallacious. True...I don't have a Visa commercial in honor of me as do volleyball greats Misty and Kerri. While they deserve such recognition, it does not mean that my life or the life of any "average" human is less precious, valuable, or useful than theirs.
The world of the hypothetical might be fun, but, like the interviewing guest, I need to watch how often I let myself live within that realm. What if I learned to live fully in the reality of my life? Now there is a hypothetical question worth pursuing.
2 comments:
OOOOH, "What if", indeed. I truly enjoyed reading this--especially on a day when a reminder was in order. Thanks for sharing your blog with me!
Yes, I think I struggle with this question, too, at times, " The gnawing question of whether or not I have made use of my life presents itself in these musings." And, likewise, just avoiding wondering altogether is always wiser because the moment I do, it usually mushrooms, resulting in sucking precious energy from me. What a powerful conclusion!! Yay :): "What if I learned to live fully in the reality of my life? Now there is a hypothetical question worth pursuing."
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