I can't commit. I can't commit to a blog post, that is. I have started numerous posts recently only to discard them, frustrated with their lack of relevance, excitement, authenticity, or pizazz. Ugh.
Besides my blog, I keep a hand-written journal that is never consistent unless I'm worked up about something. In fact, my personal journals are very telling regarding what motivates me to write. More often than not, I turn to my journal as a therapy when I am upset and my thoughts need somewhere to run instead of in the circular pattern they seem to find in my brain.
Sometimes, I let my thoughts flow unfiltered from my mind to the journal page with little thought as I go as to what I am writing. As I scribble, I think "This will probably make no sense, but who cares? Nobody is reading this anyway." Oftentimes, those passionate outpourings are some of the most powerful sections I pen. The content is nothing but raw human thought. No pretense. No proofreading. No polishing. No need.
When I write on my blog, I am instantly aware that what I "publish" might be viewed by people besides me. I feel the need to craft my words and I fuss over the formation of my thoughts. That frustrates me. If my dad were here, I am sure he would love to compare such a situation to golf. My dad always finds a way to compare life to golf.
According to my dad (and every other golf guru out there), when playing a round of golf, the best way to succeed is to relax into the game and to hold loosely to the outcome. As a junior high girl who went out to play with my dad often, I had to be reminded of this frequently. I would put a death grip on my clubs and swing as though I were fighting for my life. In such a state, I would only end up expending needless energy and runing my game. There were many times I felt angry on the course. I was too intense. I cared too much. I thought that's how the game was to be played. I paid for it every time.
Thanks, dad. Thanks for the advice on golf and life. How can I hold loosely? How can I write without expectations and the desire for perfection ruining my chances for success? How can I do anything well in life when the desire to appear awesome to any onlookers trips me up? Hmmm. That's some good food for thought.
One thing about it, I didn't go into this post with any specific goal. That's probably a good start for now. Who knows? In the name of holding more loosely (for now), I am not going to rework this thing. I don't have time to anyway. My sister's in town and it's time to sign off and get ready for an evening of fun with the relatives. The end.
3 comments:
Golfers or not, we all need to read "Golf Is Not A Game of Perfect."--This is a book that gives us hope--(all the Lord is the author of the only true HOPE)--to still have a chance after hitting an errant shot. The book also makes it clear that, at the first tee, we should have a target toward which to aim--this part of the game is often overlooked as people focus just to somehow hit the ball. We need to have purpose as we hit the ball. Pros do well in golf because often when they hit a bad shot they recover well. It's like the Proverb that states "for though a righteous man falls seven time, he rises again, but the wicked are brought down by calamity." (Proverbs 24:16) Composed thoughts therefore are important!
Wow, I never tho't about things like this.
sooo, were you writing this while you were staring at me, trying to get my attention, and IM'ing me - ha ha ha!
Good points, Dad!
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